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Building godly dating relationships

You know it’s unhealthy, and chances are it’s negatively impacting every area of your life, including your relationship with God.

You should talk to a friend, parent, or pastor you trust who can help you transition out of your relationship.

Only date someone who has a passion for following Jesus with their whole lives.

“Christians should only date Christians.” That opinion is repeated in countless books on Christian dating, and yet from my point of view it’s just not a helpful way of approaching things.

Many of us would rather put up with abuse and dysfunction in our relationships than be alone, so we go to great lengths to minimize or deny any abusive behaviour.

“Well, she’s not like that all the time.” “It isn’t really that bad.” “It’s no big deal.

Or maybe we believe we’re the one sent into this person’s life to do the saving, to make them a better person, and so we wear the abuse as a kind of badge of honour.

Maybe it brings us some kind of self-righteous satisfaction that we’re suffering for a greater purpose and are willing to love someone so “complicated.” Regardless of your particular situation, if you are involved in an abusive relationship—whether the abuse is physical, emotional, or sexual—you need to end it.

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This expectation will only suffocate any potential for the relationship to grow in a healthy way.That’s just the way our relationship is.” No relationship is perfect.Each one has its fault lines and issues, but there comes a point when a challenging relationship becomes a destructive one, and when abusive patterns have emerged that line has been crossed. If we don’t identify and end the abusive relationship until it has run its course, we will be heartbroken and devastated.If we’re not anchoring our heart’s deepest hopes and longings in Jesus, our romantic relationships will always end up disappointing and frustrating us.We’ll be placing unrealistic expectations on our relationship that can only be fulfilled by God.It’s a wonderful thing to fall in love and find someone with whom we can share our lives.However, we need to be careful that even good, healthy dating relationships don’t become stumbling blocks that cause us to forsake our first love (Revelation 2:4). It’s common for many people (especially women) to find themselves in an abusive relationship at some point in their lives.Relationships flourish when Jesus and His kingdom are the priority of both people, but falter when they aren’t.When Jesus is our first priority, our view of love, sex, and relationships is enhanced and enriched.But when Jesus is relegated to being our second, third, or fourth priority, our entire view of love, sex, and relationships becomes distorted.Knowing Jesus intimately is critical if we want to know what authentic, life-giving expressions of love, sex, and relationships look like.


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